Right Jokes

on June 8, 2013 in Right Jokes

A Retired Politician

Working people frequently ask me, a retired politician, what I do to make my days interesting. Well, for example, the other day I went into town and went into a shop. I was only in there for about 5 minutes, when I came out there was a cop writing out a parking ticket. I went up to him and said, “Come on man, how about giving a senior citizen break?” He ignored me and continued writing the ticket. I called him a Nazi turd. He glared at me and started writing another ticket for having worn tires. So I called… View Article

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on June 8, 2013 in Right Jokes

A Pastor’s Sermon

The new Pastor in an Ottawa church had been told that he needed to deliver an inspiring sermon, and that it needed to have some “kick” to it. He was cautioned to avoid politics as a subject as several high-ranking politicians were in the congregation. But he couldn’t help himself, he just had to find a way to say it: Heavenly Father, We come before you today To ask your forgiveness and To seek your direction and guidance.     We know Your Word says, “Woe to those who call evil good”   But that is exactly what we have done…. View Article

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on June 8, 2013 in Right Jokes

A Letter to God

A 10 year boy in Alberta wanted $100 badly, he needed a new bike. He prayed for weeks but nothing happened. Then he decided to write a letter to God, requesting the $100. When the post office manager saw the letter, it was addressed “God, Canada,” he decided to send it to the Prime Minister. The Prime Minister was so amused that he instructed his secretary to send the boy $5. The Prime Minister thought that this would appear to be a lot of money to the boy and that it was a good start towards the $100. The little… View Article

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on June 8, 2013 in Right Jokes

A Hockey Joke

A US first grade teacher explains to her class that she is an American. She asks her students to raise their hands if they are American too. Not really knowing why but wanting to be like their teacher, their hands explode into the air like flashy fireworks. There is, however, one exception. A girl named Kristin has not gone along with the crowd. The teacher asks her why she has decided to be different. “Because I am not an American.” “Then”, asks the teacher, “What are you?”. “I’m a proud Canadian,” boasts the little girl. The teacher is a little… View Article

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on June 8, 2013 in Right Jokes

A Girl On A Bridge

A tough looking group of bikers were riding when they saw a girl about to jump off a bridge so they stop. The leader, a big burly man, gets off his bike and says,  “What are you doing?” “I’m going to commit a suicide,” she says. While he did not want to appear insensitive, he didn’t want to miss an opportunity he asked “Well, before you jump, why don’t you give me a Kiss?” So, she does and it was a long, deep lingering kiss. After she’s finished, the biker says, “Wow! That was the best Kiss I have ever… View Article

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on June 8, 2013 in Right Jokes

A Final Act of Love

An elderly Italian man lay dying in his bed. He had served his country, he had been in politics, he had a good life, it was time. While suffering the agonies of impending death, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite ravioli wafting up the stairs. He gathered his remaining strength, and lifted himself from the bed. Gripping the railing with both hands, he crawled downstairs. When he reached the bottom of the stairs, he leaned against the door frame, gazing into the kitchen, where if not for death’s agony, he would have thought himself already in heaven, for… View Article

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on June 8, 2013 in Right Jokes

A Dog’s Life

It just hit me! My dog sleeps about 20 hours a day. He has his food prepared for him.  He can eat whenever he wants, 24/7/365. His meals are provided at no cost to Him. He visits the Dr. once a year for his checkup, and again during the year if any medical needs arise. For this he pays nothing, and nothing is required of him. He lives in a nice neighborhood in a house that is much larger than he needs, but he is not required to do any upkeep. If he makes a mess, someone else cleans it… View Article

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